The Birds and the Bees

"What's a harlot?"

Have you ever wondered what is the perfect way to bring up the birds and the bees with your children? Wonder no longer. All you have to do is read the scriptures together. With words like circumcised, eunuch, adulteress and harlot, you are bound to bring up the subject.

We were reading together last night, when Sam came across the word, harlot. He stopped and asked, "What's a harlot?" I looked at Steve. His eyes were wide and he was trying to reign in laughter. Clearly, he would not help.

"It's a woman who does bad things for money," I replied.

Sam looked at me for clarification while Maddie belted out, "Oh, you mean like burn Cd's and sell them?" Steve didn't even try to reign in the laughter.

"Uh, ya, something like that," I said.

Sam said, "Then what?"

Steve was shaking with laughter, so I knew this would be all me. "No, they sell their bodies for money."

Sam was clearly shocked as he burst out, "You mean they cut off their body parts and sell them? Like legs and arms!"

Cara screamed, "Eewww!" All the kids were clearly listening now. Steve was still silent, well except for the shaking laughter.

I looked at Steve and said in exasperation, "Are you going to help at all?" Then I looked at Sam and said, "No, they have sex with men for money."

Sam said, "Huh?"

"They have sex with men and the men pay them. It is very bad."

Steve finally decided to jump in, "A prostitute is the same thing." Oh thanks, that really helps a lot. "A harlot is the same thing as a prostitute," he continued. Oh that really helps to clarify things. Now they need to know what a prostitute is.

Sam asked, "Can they only be women?"

I said, "A harlot can only be a woman." Then I proceeded to tell the kids how the word fit into the context of the scripture we were reading. I think it was all lost on them. I'm pretty sure that the word harlot will stay with them, though.