A Tail of Two Guineas, Again

I will be the first to admit that I am not the nicest mother in the world. So let me tell you the whole story.

We had Emmy and Hazelnut (two guinea pigs) for about 10 months when it all happened. I got tired of their pee running down the wall in Maddie's room, so I had her move them to the basement, on the hardwood floor. Still, there was pee on the wall and I was really tired of the smell. It was Saturday, August 7th. We were supposed to start our vacation that day, but had to postpone for a couple of days. Because of this, we designated Saturday as fun day. We were going to the movies and bowling. About 30 minutes before it was time to leave, I told Sam and Maddie to go clean the cage as we would be leaving for vacation on Monday. They discovered worms in the cage during the process. I freaked out. They wanted to make the movie, so Steve scoured the cage and I told Sam to put them outside until we could figure out what to do.

On the way to the movies, I was freaked out. I asked the kids if they had all washed their hands and if any children had noticed worms in their poop. All I could think of was the worms the cats used to transfer to us in the sandbox when we were kids. I could not relax during the movie. When we got home, I googled "guineas and worms." I discovered that it was actually flies, laying their eggs in the leftover food. That was how little worms (maggots) got all over the place. Not as bad as worms you can catch, but still, disgusting enough. So I told the kids, the pigs needed to stay outside or in the garage until Monday, when they would be going to a friend's for pigsitting.

So Sunday came and because it was sunny on the front porch, Steve had Sam put the pigs in the backyard, without my knowledge. If I had known, I would have told Sam that the back would be super sunny by the time we got home. Well, after three hours, the sun had taken its toll. When we got home, Sam ran to check the pigs. They were laid out flat in their cage. The poor little piggies had heatstroke.

Sam ran and brought them inside. Then we put cold water in the tub and placed them in it, trying to force water in their mouths. Max walked in during the process and said, "What, Mom is actually holding a guinea pig?" Then he walked right back out. Sam's was kind of moving, but Maddie's wasn't. Sam and Maddie sat in the rocking chair holding their pigs, sobbing. I really did feel like the worst mother in the world. Soon, both pigs were rigid. I got a box because the kids wanted to bury them. When Sam tried to put the stiff guineas in, they wouldn't fit. I told him we couldn't get a bigger box so he would have to stuff them together. I reasoned, "They liked being next to each other anyway, then they won't get lonely." So Sam crammed two rigid piggies together. Steve went outside and dug a hole next to Penelope's (the first pig's) grave.

The reasons I feel like the absolute worst mother in the world are as follows:

1) I forced the kids to keep the pigs outside, knowing heat was hard on them

2) I didn't like their smell and I hated the fact that they made my house stink

3) When they died, I felt horrible seeing Sam and Maddie cry, but I was secretly happy that I no longer had to deal with the dirty little creatures.

So there you have it. We are now pet free.